Is it your duty to support your elderly parents financially when the need arises?

Chinese tradition states that the children must take care of the elderly parents as it is shameful not to do so, usually it is the sons who must take care, as the daughters marry out of the house, and so are expected to take care of their in laws. While this has been going on for centuries, to this day it still continues in most Asian countries. In this I agree that children should take care of the elderly parents. As a parent myself I have sacrificed and given everything to my children. Even though there is not much money I make sure they get a good education in order to get a good job. In Malaysia without that piece of paper you are doomed to working in low paying jobs. While they were studying they all lived at home and I fed them, cooked for them and cleaned for them. If they needed transport I was there to drive them or lend them the car.

Once they started working they continued to live at home and I continued to do their laundry and iron their clothes even though I had to work to support the younger ones. To this day, my eldest son lives at home and its fine with me, I will not be asking him to leave or kicking him out of the house. He is slowly climbing up the corporate ladder and saving money so that someday he can get married and buy his own house. Many times I go without so that my children do not have to go without. Once my children have children I will be there to take care of them so that they can go to work peacefully and not have to worry about their children as I had to do.

Selfless parents breed selfless children where the question does not arise “Do I have to take care of mom?” or “Who’s going to take care of mom?” For the people you love you make sacrifices, and continue to do so for the rest of your life. When my children need to take care of me all I’ll need is a roof over my head, a bed to sleep in and to be fed and I do not expect my grandchildren to suffer because of it. Things don’t always go the way we want in life stuff happens and I sure do not want to think that I will have to live on the street eating dog food because my children won’t take care of me.

As a good parent the thought of not taking care of the kids or abandoning them does not arise and so it should not arise for the children. We give you life we give you love we care for you and ultimately all we ask for is a little love and understanding in return and to know that when the day comes that we cannot take care of our selves, that you will be there as we have always been there for you. Now that I am not working my children do give me money to help out as I have done for them in the past.